Average Playtime: 1 hour

X Caeli: The Iron Hand of Love

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X Caeli is a bizarre amalgam of puzzle, arcade and comedic Visual Novel. It features deadly combat where you’ll need to craftily manipulate your ever-changing gear assortment to outwit your foes – it’s brains first, brawn second. The system is complex and requires some effort to master so be prepared to die a lot in the first hours of gameplay. It becomes brutally honest once you understand it, though, and every combat gets winnable – no luck involved, only skill.

You're battling the waves of incoming foes in the style of old arcades. At the beginning of each fight, you're given a randomly generated assortment of starfighter equipment - you need to outfit your ship (actually called "Throne" - protagonist is a deity so his armaments are theologically flavored) so you can counter the advances of one of the game's 40 waves of enemies. The process feels similar to making an RPG build.

Each wave of foes tries to do their own thing - some flood the screen with so much projectiles that it's almost impossible to dodge so you need to build sturdy. X Caeli is euro-shmup inspired so you don't die from the first hit. Some return to you all the damage you cause so you need to act gently. Some don't even care about destroying you and instead just try to run for the win, forcing you to go in with your guns (aka "Powers') blazing. Each wave is a puzzle to be solved and there are no clear-cut answers.

There are 12 Powers (weapons) in the game, each with completely different main and primary shooting modes. You can also enable EX modes for those, modifying their utility in varying ways. There are 6 Virtues (main stats, providing basic bonuses and enabling EX modes), 10 Acts (traits with global modificators), 5 Thrones, 5 Dominions (protective shields) and 4 Souls (powerful and slowly recharging tools). All the equipment is vastly different from each other and there are many rarely seen options there. This gives the combat tremendous replayability.

There's also a soft match-3 element. All enemies are colored and, upon their death, they harm all adjacent foes of the same color. You are not obliged to fight in this fashion and its effectiveness depends on your build - some can easily ignore it, some profit a lot. Some armaments are color dependent, dealing damage to the foes of specific colors or protecting you from their attacks. It's yet another angle to take when fighting the foes.

The story happens in-between the combats and is centered around an ancient & very evil stargod Caelum who is forced to protect a spaceship full of beautiful babes. That's not something he's used to be doing, but life is not always fair. Our story is as devoid of cliches as possible - it's definitely not another visual novel. We have a nostalgic 90-s inspired art, our girls are actually in their twenties and they behave accordingly, our protagonist is neither high school kid nor a loli. We're especially proud of our art's composition because every picture is something that you will not see anywhere else. The plot is absurdly comedic and ends with the romance, of course.
Release date
Nerd Commando Game Studios
Nerd Commando Game Studios
Age rating
Not rated

System requirements for PC

  • OS: Windows XP SP2+
  • Processor: 2.0 GHz
  • Memory: 1 GB RAM
  • DirectX: Version 9.0c
  • Storage: 2 GB available space

System requirements for macOS

  • OS: Mac OS X 10.9+
  • Processor: 2.0 GHz
  • Memory: 1 GB RAM
  • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0
  • Storage: 2 GB available space

System requirements for Linux

  • OS: Ubuntu 12.04+, SteamOS+
  • Processor: 2.0 GHz
  • Memory: 1 GB RAM
  • Graphics: Shader Model 3.0
  • Storage: 2 GB available space
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Last Modified: Aug 28, 2019

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Pleasant Dreams
Kill three foes at once with Blast damage.
Ten Commandments
Vanquish 10 foes under Testament's bonus.
Field Trip
Exile 12 foes in one combat with the EX of Exodus alter.
Kill 20 foes with Rosary alter fire.
Spear of Destiny
Attack three blue foes with Longinus main.
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X Caeli: The Iron Hand of Love reviews and comments

Translated by
Microsoft from Russian
Early Access Review Shorter People, watched the developer's video, where he asks to believe him, buy the game and play it longer, that would be after 1-2 hours "enlightenment (verbatim quote)". After Write a review. A Little about myself. I have a few Games in my profile, for obvious reasons I prefer not to pay, but the experience of video game 26 years. With Genesis started. Since 98 The PC-Boyarin. So, the author of the game Saws good views on the Yutuba and asked, not even Donatov, but just to rate the game, and a larger number of reviewers, having played (yes, just in the screensaver sat, KVM) No more than 5 hours wrote positive reviews (apparently decided to support the author, To further sawed the viewfinder). I Decided to believe, and I, although at first glance, on the video thought that crossed why then go with the hedgehog, and then the creation stretched to the globe. Came into the game and see a crooked painted Visual Novel in the anime style. Well there with the breasts and prokno. With humor. I don't care, the main thing is gemplay. Then you're in the hangar. Where very not understandable, very abstract abilities, numbers, feathers, etc., All the Persians and attributes no more than 30, which is where poking is not clear. We'Ll figure it out. Still always at the heaviest level of difficulty in the game I love to play. Gameplay. Space invanders with RPG component by type. Actually a puzzle. You are moving ships (enemies of different types and colors with their abilities and poorly distinguishable pattern) and you shoot them until the energy ends. The Energy will eventually regenerate. Different enemies rob her. You have their lives, too. And so on. So, I do not know randomized enemies with the beginning of a new game, but I got the archon, Witch and Harpy. I haven't passed the first level. Enlightenment has not come. Enemies change color, throwing a zigzag lightning, put mines, energy ends, I can not shoot, and enemies come. But This is until the enemies do not shoot with a straight zipper. And from the color and type of enemies I have not defined the dependence of this lightning. Shooting Lightning They demolish the energy, I can not shoot without energy, then they destroy the health of the same lightning. Survive manages to 2-4 the launch of this lightning from various ships (they shoot fire). That is my time of life on the battlefield is limited to 15-40 seconds. I go to the hangar trying various perks, abilities, attributes. Stabbing. I'M trying to combine. 15-40 seconds and all! In general, I decided: Who wants to understand this game: try to first demo can achieve "enlightenment". I do say: YES WELL ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥, ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
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