Average Playtime: 1 hour

Get in the Car, Loser!

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About

She said "GET IN THE CAR, LOSER! I know you're not up to anything this summer, I've got the Sword of Fate, and there's an ancient evil that needs to be sealed away."

            

Everyone knows the story of how the great hero of legend Agi of Roses fought the Machine Devil and used the Sword of Fate to seal him away for a thousand years. Now, hateful Machine Devil cultist edgelords are spreading terror in order to summon him again, and the Divine Order that rules over our world claims that fighting them before it's too late would be "just as bad as them."

That's bullshit, and that's why three young attendees of the local Academy of Order and one renegade angel from the Divine Order are heading off on a road trip to take the fight to the Machine Devil and his cultists. Will you succeed in your mission to save the world for another thousand years and hit every diner along the road on the way, or will you just be a useless gay disaster?

A lesbian road trip RPG by the co-creator of Ladykiller in a Bind about fighting for love and justice in the face of indifference, and "discovering yourself," whatever the fuck that means.

Introducing...

Sam Anon
Battle Specialty: Support/Ravage
she/her
The protagonist of the story, your new goth girlfriend, and the titular loser. She has no idea how she got roped into this trip (it's because she is a lesbian disaster who would do anything a pretty girl told her to) but is going to try her best anyway. The healer of the party. Catch her hollering at the Machine Devil about how the void belongs to everyone.

Grace Morningstar
Battle Specialty: Exploit/Destruction
she/her
Solid A student/queen bitch of the Academy, and the current wielder of the Sword of Fate (100% stolen). She fights for what's right and isn't afraid to drop some BIG DAMAGE to back that up. You should be excited and grateful to have had the chance to have admired her before she becomes the new hero of legend reknowned throughout the land.

Valentin Vaillante
Battle Specialty: Exploit/Tank
they/them
Grace's cool boyfriend who actually knows how to drive. A former TA at the Academy of Order, currently taking a break to spend the summer smiling in the face of danger. Normally quiet and reserved, but is capable of projecting when it's time to tank in battle for the entire team... or when they come up with a dumb joke.

Angela
Battle Specialty: Exploit/Ravage
she/her
She big. The Thirty-Second Arm of the Divine Order and an actual literal angel, who has decided she can no longer idly stand by like the rest of the order. She's not sure if it's possible for a being operating on her plane of existence to truly relate to humans, but it seems like it would be fun to try. A completely average fighter by intent, since it would disrupt the divine cosmology if she ever unleashed her true power while fighting alongside mortals, even against the Machine Devil.

Features
  • Active time battle system inspired by classic and modern JRPGs—fight strategically and take advantage of each party member's complementary abilities in order to keep momentum on your side and make it through the gauntlet of fights the road throws at you.
  • Equipment-based character progression system: each item offers different abilities based off what character you give it to, and can be rearranged on the fly at any time between fights to create completely different party builds.
  • Genre-defying pop soundtrack by Christa Lee, because how can you say it's battle music if it doesn't even bang?
  • Visual novel inspired dialogue system allows for optimal "shoving your foot in your mouth while shooting the shit in the backseat" experience.
  • No sidequests, no maps, no codex entries. Who's got time for that when the world is in peril?!
  • Girls. Just... girls... you know...??? They're great
  • The Disaster Lesbian Representation We Need In 2018

COMING 2018
Want an email when the game comes out? Sign up here!

By LOVE CONQUERS ALL GAMES: writing/programming/design by Christine Love (Ladykiller in a Bind), concept art by Isaac Robin (Witch Trade), pixel art by Lachlan Cartland, music by Christa Lee (Welcome to the Fantasy Zone), vocals by Jami Lynne.

Presskit is available here.

Platforms
Genre
Release date
Developer
Love Conquers All Games
Publisher
Love Conquers All Games
Age rating
Not rated

System requirements for PC

System requirements for macOS

Minimum:
  • OS: OS X El Capitan 10.11 or later
  • Processor: 2.2 GHz
  • Memory: 4 GB RAM
  • Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 5000 or better
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Last Modified: Dec 16, 2023

Where to buy

itch.io
Steam

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Get in the Car, Loser! reviews and comments

The art is nice, the combat system not bad at all, the story is extra woke but in an intelligent way most of the time. Too bad the second level is extremely difficult and I couldn't find the upgrade of my equipment soon enough in order to enjoy the game. I am a little bit sad actually now
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