ASS-TROIDS v0.5

8===================================D

    ~~~ASS-TROIDS~~~

    ~~~v0.5x~~~

    ~~~John Q. Psychic 2023~~~

   ====Credit to @horrorbuns for the Murdoch art (eat your heart our Kwaver!)===

8===================================D

Uh, hello! Thank you for checking out this "game".

This was made for Strawberry Jam 7, and the theme was "Horny Games".

Though it may look like it was hacked together in a weekend, we actually had the entire month of February to work on our little abominations. The original concept I had for this game was to make one giant metaphor for the surprisingly epic journey a sperm cell takes to reach the egg, and I had plenty of really cool ideas I was hoping to impliment. Unfortunately, almost all of them had to be cut because I just completely stopped working on my entry after the first week and procrastinated until like the very last day.

Goddamnit.

Anyway, ASS-TROIDS thrusts the player into a reasonably accurate simulation of orbit around THE BLACK HOLE SUN and hands them a "gun". Your goal is simple: Shoot the space rocks, don't let any of them hit you.

The challenge, of course, is that your targets are moving, and your "gun" is an ejaculating penis. Good luck!

CONTROLS:

W --- Accelerate forward

A --- Accelerate left

S --- Accelerate backward

D --- Accelerate right

SPACE --- Accelerate upward

LSHIFT --- Accelerate downward

I/J/K/L --- Rotate spaceship

E --- Roll right

Q --- Roll left

P --- Toggle Precision Maneuvering Mode

TAB --- Toggle 3rd person camera

F/LMB --- Fire Main Weapon

R/RMB --- Deploy Grenade

TIPS AND TRICKS:

- Your spaceship is already in a stable orbit around THE BLACK HOLE SUN when the game begins. Don't panic, it's not going to immediately suck you in.

- There is very little friction in space. Your ship will continue to coast even if you are not firing your thrusters. Avoid overdoing your thrusters.

- Don't aim for where the asteroid is, aim for where it is going to be.

- If an asteroid is rushing straight for you, shooting it may be more effective than trying to dodge.

- The little red asteroids with exclamation marks are BOMBS. Feel free to shoot at one, just so long as you keep your distance.

- Stay away from THE BLACK HOLE SUN. Its gravity causes nearby asteroids to move quickly, making them that much harder to actually hit.

- Your bullets and grenades are NOT massless. Don't forget to factor in recoil while maneuvering.

- Beware of Kessler Syndrome.