Average Playtime: 3 hours

Calm Down, Stalin

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Calm Down, Stalin is a game where you directly control your hands to threaten your enemies with nuclear weapons by moving your finger closer to The Button while signing important state papers, answering phone, dealing with your subordinates and most of all - fighting the stress of your position by smoking your pipe and any other available means!

  • directly control your arms to move things around and interact with them
  • smoke your pipe to reduce stress and prevent shaking hands
  • set of useful tools and annoying distractions
  • story mode that unlocks more items to use
  • endless mode to challenge yourself and your friends for high score

Release date
Cartboard Games
Cartboard Games
Age rating
Not rated

System requirements for PC

  • OS: Windows Vista
  • Processor: 3 GHz 2 Core
  • Memory: 2 GB RAM
  • Graphics: 1GB dedicated
  • DirectX: Version 10
  • Storage: 500 MB available space
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Last Modified: Aug 28, 2019

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The Lenin'
Unlock the Lenin Bust
The Buzzin'
Unlock the Fly
The Punchin'
Unlock the Punching Bag
The Bangin'
Unlock the Gun
...or a necessity?
Unlock the flagposts
view all achievements
16 items

Calm Down, Stalin reviews and comments

Translated by
Microsoft from Deutsch
Best Stalin Simulator Currently available on the open Market (* kotz * Free Market Economy). One perched on his comfortable Armchair while you pull happily at the Whistle and also skin a cheap Ikea lamp. In order to keep the imperialist and capitalist West in Check, it is also a danger to press "The Red Button." However, you can't ignore all the Problems (the Expert talks about "Waymarks") and the good Joseph gets to deal with the Stress quickly. With the Finger 3mm above the Doomsday button and a Data Cesser like Pope John Paul II, the End is already close to grabbing. There is only one Sensible Solution: Vodka! Quickly ordered a Glass, scared away two Flies and shot a West Spy and already it continues relaxed in the Program. Being Stalin is not a Easy Task. This Game inspired me to pursue a Career as An absolute political Leader. While It's said "Smoking harms you and the People around You," it doesn't take on entirely new Proportions until you Accidentally drop Stalin's beloved Pipe on the red Button. Pro Tip: It looks very inviting, but the Button is also not suitable as a Coaster for the Vodka glass. Also, you shouldn't make the Mistake of going to the Phone during this Game in Real Life. The Callers are often confused when you are still fully immersed in the Game with "Comrade Stalin on the Telephone Apparatus, Hello." Would Destroy the World with a wodka cup again! ☭/10
Translated by
Microsoft from French
Product received for free father of peoples, it is a long-term work and a formidable tension. This game will try to transcribe all the difficulty that is the work of Russian dictator, a big challenge not? You play Stalin in an approximate modeling, behind his desk while a conflict may burst at any time. This conflict is symbolized by a clock and quickly, you will have to hold the blow so as not to crack and press the red button that would launch the conflict. But where is the difficulty, you say? Clever, the game offers you at each level to add a little stress in your life. You have to answer the phone to prevent the ringtone from stressing you, smoking the pipe to calm you down a bit unless killing a Quidam with a pistol, off-screen, is more effective. And this damn fly that will come to bore you! And this lamp with the defective bulb that is only flashing! All this increases the stress of this dear Stalin, who sees his hand, his finger, always more dangerously approaching the famous red button. Will you be able to prevent a terrible conflict by succeeding in finding absolute zenitude? Calm down Stalin looks like a "YouTube game", and I almost gave you a video (before a very popular "YouTuber" did it very well before me). It is not beautiful, it looks like a big joke and yet it works perfectly. A good game of stress to get excited between your quiet moments. Gee, we've seen more salesman as a conclusion...
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